03 March 2008

Do The Airlines Hate Me That Much?

Why am I always the lucky one? Why?

I don't cause any trouble. I mind my own business. I fasten my seat belt when the light is illuminated. I put all of my liquids, gels and/or aerosols in a 1 quart, sealable plastic bag.

Why then do I ALWAYS get seated next to a person who is far too large to fit in a single seat on the plane?!?!?!

Today's offender wasn't a fat person, he was just too tall/broad-shouldered for the seats in the commuter plane I was on. He was a late-middle-aged guy, probably early 50's, and my gaydar sounded the alarm the instant he stepped onto the plane. I think that God hated me today. I was already on the plane, in my seat, listening to a little Radiohead and casually thinking, sigh... I hope some cute boy gets the seat next to me today...

MISTAKE! BIG MISTAKE!

So, instead of granting my winsome desire of sitting next to some eye candy, God plants me next to a ginormous, old gay guy. It was depressing.

I don't ever want to be an old gay guy. But, that's probably an ungrantable wish.

7 comments:

Tara said...

Ah, Max. You are one of my favorites :)

Abelard Enigma said...

Maybe you weren't clear and god granted the ginormous, old gay guy his wish :)

Max Power said...

One of your favorites, Felicity? Just one?


Abe, you might be on to something there. I should be more direct in praying for random, hot gay boys to sit next to me on the plane. Maybe I should make a sign and pin it on the seat next to me the next time I fly: This Seat Reserved for Hot, Gay Boys! :P

Abelard Enigma said...

There are a couple other options

You could fly Air New Zealand

You could book your flights through Travelocity

Max Power said...

Brilliant, Abe! :D

Sean said...

um, i hate to break this to you Max, but you are now (as your latest post suggest) an old queen...just the the few others here in this wide world of queerosphere.

dont worry though the b@tching about the younger than 35s is a great deal of fun..... ;)

Max Power said...

Thanks for your words of support, Sean. Why are we friends again? :P