I had someone use the phrase "It's called growing up" at me on Sunday, and I kind of wanted to punch him in the face. Why are old, married people so obsessed with that concept? Why is "maturity" based on marital status and how boring your life is?
It was a guy who used to be a counsellor in the bishopric of the singles ward that I went to before I got too old to be in YSA singles wards (four years ago). He's been a bishop of another ward and is now one of the stake clerks. I'll call him Mr. F.
For any of you who are fans of the greatest television show to have ever existed, Arrested Development, you should have the "Mr. F" jingle floating through your mind right now. You're welcome. :D
So, Mr. F comes walking down the hallway at church and stops to say hello to some people that were standing near me. He then said hello to me and asked me how I was doing. He then asked about the band and what we were up to.
I responded that we weren't doing much any more, due to the fact that two of my bandmates are married with children. And our most recent "show" was playing for our lead singer's ward talent show the previous Friday. I then remarked, "You know, it's just kind of surreal that we could go from playing big venues up in L.A. for large crowds of people, to touring the UK and Ireland a few times, and then a year and a half later find ourselves so starved for attention that we agree to play at a ward talent show."
To which he responded, "Well, it's called growing up!" as he laughed and excused himself to run off somewhere. That's not the first time I've heard comments from him and many other people along that same line. I believe the translation of it is, "Oh, well you have fun with your life, so you are immature. You need to be boring so you can consider yourself all growed up. Your life is worthless because you enjoy yourself too much."
Listen, buddy, I'm plenty grown up. I have a BS and MS in Mechanical Engineering, have an MBA, own my own home, own income properties, have a good paying job, manage a stock portfolio, and am starting my own business on the side. Oh yeah, and I'm gay yet have still had the maturity to not abandon my religious beliefs. If that isn't grown up, I don't know what is. Don't be jealous that I enjoy my life more than you yours and try to pass it off as me being immature.
As I thought that, I just forced a smile and bid him farewell.
Why is it that single people in the church are looked down upon like they are some scourge to society? Oh yeah, I remember. Thanks a lot, Brigham.